I loved this story, and omg if this could be true what a different world we could live in!!

Brad is looking for an anniversary present for his boyfriend Alex during his lunch, and finds a little shop.  Inside he is drawn to a medallion at the back of the shop.  The old lady in the shop actually gives the medallion to Alex, telling him it belonged with him and Alex.

When he got back to work in the senators office, he looks at the medallion in more detail, and notices a hand-scribbled note with it that read "What lies beneath is seldom seen, but grasp this firmly and truth you'll glean".

Brad went out after work with his colleagues, when Alex said he was working overtime, and as he left work he pocketed the medallion.  

When he sat with someone, he then grasped the medallion which was in his picket, and then strange things began to happen........ he could hear their reply, but he could also hear what they were thinking too.... and quite often they would say one thing and think something else.

Now is the time we really find out what the medallion can do, and some of what Brad hears, makes him take a good long look at his life, and this then gives him the courage to try and change things.... but not always in a good way!

After years of travelling the world using his trust fund, college-dropout Joshua Silverton returns to London to discover two shocking truths; his estranged and wealthy father has been dead for over a year and he left his fortune to a total stranger. Joshua soon meets the man who stole his inheritance and even though he expects to hate Ezra Steele, he can’t ignore the strange attraction he suddenly feels towards him.

Bill Silverton saved Ezra Steele from his troubled past when he signed Silverton Tower over to him on his deathbed. Ezra now has the house, the business, the cars, the money and a different man in his bed every night. It’s a life he wants to cling to, so when Bill’s gorgeous son unexpectedly turns up and demands he hand everything back, his life is turned upside down in more ways than one.

A need to finally prove himself to his dead father forces Joshua to challenge Ezra but will he be able to ignore the attraction in order to be ruthless? Ezra tries to keep his enemies close by getting Joshua into his bed but as history catches up with him, he is forced to face himself. They are both running from their past, so in a battle between head and heart, Joshua and Ezra must choose what is more important – money or each other.

Joshua also came across as a spoilt brat and I really did want to reach into the Kindle and shake some sense into him! It was like he expected everything to be done as he wanted.

OMG.... Wow...... What can I say about this book - well for one thing I could not put down my kindle, I just had to keep reading until I had finished it.  I thought I knew what was going to happen, but there are a few surprises in store near the end of the book..

Ezra - to be honest I wasn't sure about him to begin with.... he did come across as someone who was so arrogant.  He seemed to forget where he was before he got Silverton Company.  I took a bit of dislike to him too when I first started reading, but this soon changed!

Joshua was totally naive I think, he had been away for six years travelling the world, and using his trust fund and hardly any contact with his father.  When he returned back for his cousins wedding, he then found out his father has died the previous year, and to really put the icing on the cake, he was then told that his father had left his company to a third party - not Joshua..

Joshua and Ezra meet - not knowing who each other are, and although Joshua believes he is straight, he is attracted to Ezra.  Ezra is smitten too, to the extent that he forgoes his normal one night twinks, to chase Joshua instead.  Joshua is confused by his feelings . 

When Joshua decides to confront the person he has decided stole his inheritance from him, he cannot believe his eyes when he realises who it is that has done so..... Ezra.  Ezra is equally shocked, and at first not believing that Joshua is who he says he is.

This is where the story really takes off, and I don't want to give too much away.... this book is full of people with ulterior motives. Joshua and Ezra seem to be finally be getting along better, but in the background lurks the lawyer Joshua saw when he first returned home, and although Joshua has told him that he doesn't want to try and claim his inheritance, there are others around who together with his lawyer believe Joshua to, in effect, a stupid boy who they can manipulate.

When events start to unfold, this is when you will not be able to take your eyes off the book, as you want to see exactly what pans out.... and it is not what you would have thought either.

It has been a while since I have read a book that has kept me hooked like this one, once I started, although I disliked the MC's at first, this didn't put me off continuing, and as I have already said my dislike soon changed as events unfolded.

I look forward to seeing more from this author.

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Ashley John is a young gay author of gay romance novels. Living in the north of England with his fiance and two cats, Ashley John spends his days writing down the voices he hears in his head. His books are primarily romance dramas with sprinklings of erotica and he has a knack for making you feel like you're living right beside the characters he creates. Ashley John is also a keen artist and he puts his artistic side to designing all of his own covers.

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Title: All Man
Author: Jay Northcote
Publisher: Jaybird Press (self published)
Length: 13,000 words
Genre: Contemporary gay romance/erotica
Cover Artist: Jay Northcote
Release Date: Saturday 8th August

“You’re the sleek little sports car to my Land Rover.”

From the moment Gareth walks through the door of the salon to fit some new sinks, Jules can’t take his eyes off him. Jules has always been attracted to men who are his polar opposite, so burly Gareth is Jules’s fantasy man.

At the weekend, Jules gets into a tough situation with another bloke in a gay club and Gareth comes to his aid. Gareth rejects Jules’s subsequent advances but leaves him with the hope that his attraction isn’t completely one-sided. Fantasy could become reality.

With Gareth’s work at the salon nearly done, he’ll soon disappear from Jules’s life for good. Time is running out. Jules needs to prove to Gareth that he’s tougher than he looks and that his feelings run deeper than gratitude.

Although this is a standalone book, you will first meet Jules in Top Me Maybe, and this is his story.  I have to say I love Jules, he comes over as so young and carefree .  

He meets Gareth while at work, and he is totally in lust with him!  He does speak with Gareth while at work, and is then quite often away in his fantasies starring Gareth and himself!

One weekend while at a club, Jules gets himself into a bad situation, which I would think could happen to anyone, and although he manages to help himself, he is relieved when Gareth arrives on the scene to comfort him.

After having his advances rejected by Gareth, Jules is not sure if Gareth actually fancies him or not - but at work on Monday all becomes crystal clear when they walk together at lunchtime, and finally agree to go on a date together.

Does the date go according to plan??  Does Jules actually get his man??  Is Gareth the man that Jules has been waiting for??

I so loved reading this story, I have to say I love Jules and Gareth, as they are so different..  Gareth is the big bear type - but don't let this fool you, you will be quite pleasantly surprised. After the club incident, Jules is affected more than he realises, but Gareth shows Jules the true type of man that he is......

“Hi.” Jules grinned down at the bloke lying on his back under the basins, taking a moment to admire the very respectable looking bulge in his jeans. “Gareth isn’t it? Fancy another cup of tea?”

Jules knew full well the man’s name was Gareth. It had been imprinted in his memory since Gareth, in all his bear-like glory, had stepped through the front door of the hairdressing salon that morning. He’d introduced himself, and Julian had been smitten on sight.

“Oh, yeah. That’d be great, thanks, Julian.”

“You can call me Jules.” Jules tried not to flutter his eyelashes, but he thought they probably did it without his permission. Big, butch blokes like Gareth always brought out the femme in him—it was how he reacted when he was nervous and excited. The more masculine they were, the more camp he got, even when he tried to tone it down.

Gareth didn’t seem to mind, though.

“Okay, Jules.” He gave Jules another one of his surprisingly sweet smiles before getting back to whatever he was doing with the pipes under the new sink he was installing.

Jules hummed happily to himself as he pottered around the cramped little kitchen in the back of the salon, waiting for the kettle to boil. He lined up four mugs and put in instant coffee for Shelley and Tyler and tea bags for Gareth and himself. He added a sweetener for Shelley—who was on a diet again—one sugar to his mug, and two for Gareth, remembering that was how Gareth took his tea.

Jules had carefully stored away every little detail about Gareth so they’d be there to mull over later. He grinned as a surge of excitement made his heart lift. It was always fun having a crush. Gareth was probably straight so it was bound to be unrequited, but a bit of eye candy made the day so much brighter.

He took Shelley and Tyler their drinks first and then went back for his and Gareth’s so he had the excuse to linger for a moment after delivering it.

“I’ll put it up here on the shelf,” he told Gareth. “Don’t let it get cold.”

Gareth was still on his back under the sinks, rattling around with a spanner or a wrench or something. Jules had no idea. His expertise was more with a different type of tool.

Gareth’s T-shirt had ridden up where his body was twisted, but his face was out of sight, so Jules took the opportunity to blatantly admire his hairy stomach. He was solid, not gym ripped lean, but not chubby either. He was all muscle and man. Jules tilted his head and sighed appreciatively. He really was the perfect bear.

“Jules, stop daydreaming and come sweep up for me, you slacker.” Tyler’s voice was light and teasing.

Jules glared at him, ignoring the flush that swept up his neck to his cheeks. “Yeah, yeah.”

Tyler grinned. He clearly knew exactly what Jules was daydreaming about. But the lucky bastard had Duncan—his own personal bear—at home, so he could sod off. Jules had to take his kicks where he could get them, and if that meant ogling Gareth, then so be it. He’d definitely be starring in Jules’s wank fantasies tonight.

Jules took one last peek at Gareth’s package and wondered what his cock looked like. Shame he’d never get a chance to find out.

Jay lives just outside Bristol in the West of England, with her husband, two children, and two cats.

She comes from a family of writers, but she always used to believe that the gene for fiction writing had passed her by. She spent years only ever writing emails, articles, or website content. One day, she decided to try and write a short story–just to see if she could–and found it rather addictive. She hasn’t stopped writing since.

After years of physical and mental abuse, Tommy Chadwick finally finds the strength to leave Colin, his tormentor. But Tommy soon finds that escaping his violent boyfriend was only the first step on his path to recovery.

Now he must overcome feelings of worthlessness in order to rebuild his battered self-esteem.

Tommy’s lack of self-confidence prevents him from going out... at first, but then has him ricocheting from one man to another, desperately trying to please them in his search for love and acceptance.

After being rejected on New Year’s Eve, and then beaten after leaving the gay bar, he agrees to accompany his best friend, Sarah, to a martial arts club. There Tommy meets Marcus, a strong older man, who at first becomes his friend, introducing Tommy to new interests, and later, tentatively asks him on a date.

Will Marcus be the man to help Tommy put his past behind him and fall in love for real?

After reading the blurb for this book, I just had to read it – there are not many books that I have read that deal with the uncomfortable subject of physical and mental abuse.  I was hooked from the first page, and I am not sure how the author did it, but at times I just wanted to reach into the book and talk to Tommy about what he was doing….

Tommy finally manages to escape from the abuse, but what is clear is that he thinks he is worthless and not very loveable at all.  This really shows in his actions, when looks online and finds a gay bar nearby, and over the next few months seems to be picking up a new man every couple of months…. This changed on New Year’s Eve, when someone told him how he was acting, and then while trying to get back home, he was attacked.

This made Tommy take a good long look at himself, and he realised he didn’t like who he was.  At work, luckily for him, someone had recognised the signs of him being previously abused, and had offered to go for coffee with him when he wanted to talk, and finally he decided to do so, and it was the best thing he could have done – he finally admitted to someone exactly what had happened to him, and made him realise that he wasn’t the only one it had happened to, but he only he could stop his destructive behaviour.

When he finally agrees to go with Sarah, his best friend, to a martial arts class, he is surprised with how much he enjoys it – even more so as it gave him some way of defending himself.  He was trained while there by Marcus, and began to feel attracted to Marcus, but for obvious reasons did nothing about it.  One evening it was just Tommy and Marcus at the class, and while training Marcus held Tommy around the neck and this totally freaked Tommy out…. And Tommy eventually admitted to Marcus what had happened, and there tommy found a kindred spirit as Marcus had been in exactly the same position.

Over time, Marcus and Tommy grew closer and began dating, and Marcus was conscious of the fact that Tommy was apprehensive, and it was like he was treating him with kid gloves.  Tommy was so convinced that he would do something to spoil things – and he very nearly did when he jumped to all the wrong conclusions when Marcus hadn’t contacted him for a couple of days.  All the insecurities he thought he had overcome hit him again, and he very nearly threw away the best thing that had happened to him – but when he found out the Marcus had been hurt, he felt comfortable enough to tell Marcus what he had been thinking.  This only seemed to strengthen their relationship, and Tommy was able to bask in the glow of being in love and knowing he was loved back for who he was.  This story does have a HEA, and I am glad it did, but to me this book showed how even though you escape the abusive relationship, the after effects can take a long while to be put behind you, and sometimes they rear their ugly head when you least expect it.

Please also read the Guest Post below….. as it will also give you a real insight into this story. Thank you Louise for being so open and honest.

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Shane rang me the next day after work, and my heart leapt when his name came up on my phone. I was in the lounge talking to Sarah, and I jogged upstairs to my room as I answered the call. I told myself he couldn’t wait until Saturday and wanted to speak to me in the meantime.

“Hi, Shane,” I said brightly.

“Hi.” He cleared his throat. “About Saturday....”

“Yes?” I wondered if the arrangement for the weekend was to change.

“It’s not gonna happen. I’m sorry.”

“Oh!” I felt the smile slip from my face, and I waited for him to elaborate.

“I’ve got a girlfriend. She’s been working in Spain for a few weeks, and I didn’t think she was coming back until next month, but she turned up this morning. Sorry.”

“Girlfriend?” I echoed, stunned.

“Yeah, I’m bi.”

“I thought you said you broke up with someone recently.”

“Well, she’s been away a long time, and we’d had a row when I said that.” I could picture him shrugging as he spoke.

“Oh. Okay. No problem.” I did my best to sound as if I didn’t care, while my heart plummeted into my shoes and tears prickled at the back of my eyes. When I ended the call, I reminded myself about everything that had been wrong in the very brief relationship. He didn’t talk, we had nothing in common, and he was inconsiderate in bed. But I’d liked him, far too much, and it fucking hurt that he had a girlfriend I didn’t know about. It hurt that he’d probably only been using me to fill in the time until she came back.

I curled up on my bed and wrapped my arms around myself. I wouldn’t let myself cry—I’d done far too much of that over Colin—but my throat hurt with the effort of not giving in to it, and my jaw ached from grinding my teeth. I lost track of time as I lay there feeling sorry for myself and wondering if I should have stayed with Gary after all.

“Tommy?” Sarah called softly from the doorway and waited.

“Yeah.” I rolled onto my back and forced a smile onto my face.

“What’s wrong, hun?” She closed the door and came to sit on the edge of my bed. My smile apparently hadn’t been very convincing, and I let it slip away.

“Nothing, I’m okay.”

“You were all excited when your phone rang, and now you look like a puppy that’s been kicked.”

“Thanks.” I grimaced and tried to laugh it off.

“Is it that bloke you’ve been seeing?”

“Shane. I’m not seeing him anymore. He’s got a girlfriend,” I blurted out. My eyes smarted again, and I blinked.

“I’m sorry.” Sarah rested her hand on my shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “But you’d only seen him a couple of times, hadn’t you?”

“Yeah, well, I’m a prick. We didn’t even have much in common. Less than me and Gary. But somehow I suppose I....” I sniffed miserably and sat up. “I really liked him.”

“Oh, Tommy.” Sarah slid her arms around me to give me a cuddle, and I sagged against her. I felt pathetic. I couldn’t say I was heartbroken over someone I’d had sex with twice, but I felt the sharp pain of rejection all over again, and the fragile confidence I’d built up since I left Colin began to crumble. Shane slipped from my mind, and I thought of a situation I’d been in with Colin more times than I could count.

“Get your shit packed and get out of here, Tommy.” Colin sneered at me from the couch. “You’re a pathetic waste of space and I’m sick of the sight of you.”

“You seriously want me to leave? Who’s going to pay the bills, then?” I asked.

“I’ll have no trouble getting a new flat mate. I don’t know why I haven’t done this sooner. There are plenty of cute boys out there. I don’t know why I stuck with the ugly little slut you are for so long.”

“Fine. I’ll go.” I turned away from him as hot tears spilled down my cheeks. He didn’t want me, didn’t care about me. I felt lost and crushed and relieved all at the same time. Maybe this time he’d really let me go.

I went into the bedroom and found my rucksack. I began packing my clothes first, while I sobbed and snuffled, and repeatedly wiped my eyes and nose on my sleeves. It was just after our first anniversary. He’d given me the ring and told me how much he loved me, how special I was to him, and how things would be perfect between us from now on. I’d almost forgotten all the times he’d hurt me, and even though I didn’t like the ring, I’d been delighted to receive it. It made me believe he really did love me. The next couple of days had been perfect—until now. I could barely remember what had started it—something to do with him not liking my suggestion we go out somewhere. We spent our whole lives cooped up in the flat except for me going to work and him going fishing with Gary. I’d thought we could do something nice together, but he could only see that I wanted to get out so I could look at other men or get attention from them.

I crammed the last few items into my rucksack and set it aside. I looked up to find Colin standing in the doorway, watching me.

“I’m sorry, babe,” he said. “I didn’t mean any of it. You know how jealous I get. I love you so much, and I want to keep you all to myself.”

“So why did you tell me to leave?” I said in a small voice.

“I wasn’t thinking straight. I don’t want you to leave. I never want you to leave.” He came to me and took my hands. He stroked his thumb over the ring I wore. “This means we’re together forever. I’m never gonna let you go, Tommy. I promise.” He began kissing my face all over, tasting my tears. “Forgive me. Come on. You know I love you.”

The day had ended with him fucking me on the floor from behind, so hard he’d almost smashed my head into the wall. I’d been so sore afterward, I could barely sit down without yelping.

“Tommy, are you sure this is just about Shane?” Sarah was stroking my hair, and I realized I’d wept all over her blouse and left a wet patch on her shoulder. I pulled away and rubbed my hands over my face.

“Sorry. Uh... yeah, I’m just being stupid. I thought things were going well. Clearly I was wrong.”

“Are you sure that’s all? You seem so upset.”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You know, I don’t get why you broke up with Gary. He seemed really nice.” Sarah frowned in puzzlement. “He treated you well, didn’t he?”

“Yes, but we had nothing in common. We never did anything except... never mind.” I laughed and felt my face heat up. “I’m fine, really.”

I was fine. I moped for two days and then went out to La Rues again. I met Paul, whom I dated for two weeks. He was ginger and freckled, and I wasn’t really attracted to him, but he was keen on me and he made me feel better. My confidence rose again, and I forgot about Shane. I felt good and I began to feel I could get anyone I wanted.

I wrote this story only a few months ago, almost from beginning to end inside a month. Unusually for me, I barely made any notes with the exception of a timeline for the characters which I made as I wrote. Once I’d written my characters’ biographies, the story simply flowed and the reason for that is that the basic tale is a true story—mine.

One day in April 1994, I escaped from 2 years 10 months of physical and mental abuse, with only some clothes and my much-loved car, which had somehow survived along with me. It was the only thing my abuser didn’t succeed in taking away from me. My character Tommy Chadwick escapes with a couple of bagfuls of belongings and his little red Mini.

The basics of the story are very close to my own experiences and feelings—for example, the day Tommy escapes and the events of that day. Later he discovers that walking out the door and leaving an abusive relationship behind is not the end of it. He craves love and attention, and tries to find this by having sex with a lot of random people, and of course he finds nothing but hurt and sadness. Eventually he takes the advice of a close friend and also a work colleague, and changes the way he goes about things. He finds someone special in an unlikely place, just as I did. Tommy finds Marcus, who’s completely different from any of his past lovers.

There are plenty of events and details in the book which are only Tommy’s life that I’ve created for him, but the outline of the story came from my own experience. In a way that made it easier to write, because the basics were in my memories rather than me having to create them first and note them down. The process of writing the story was also cathartic for me. Even though more than 20 years have passed, it’s an experience I’ll never forget.

 What was it that made you want to write about gay characters and MM novels?

When I was about 16 years old, a friend showed me a video of the movie, My Beautiful Laundrette, starring Daniel Day Lewis and I loved it. I bought a copy and watched it over and over and it gave me the idea to write gay romances. Back then I wrote stories to entertain myself featuring my favourite rock stars, which eventually developed into MM Fanfiction some 20 years later.

 When did you first realize that you were a writer?

I’ve always written stories, going back to being 8 years old and making up stories about little girls and ponies. But I didn’t really see myself as a writer until I’d written some successful Fanfictons resulting in some of my readers suggesting I publish something. I didn’t think it would be that simple, but after taking the advice of a couple of friends who’d gone the same route and were a little ahead of me, I received my first acceptance in February 2014. Then it became real, rather than just for fun.

What genre of writing would you classify yourself with?

I’ve written in a number of sub-genres under the MM heading, including contemporary, supernatural and sci-fi, but I would say primarily I write contemporary.

What's the most difficult element of being an author today?

For me personally, it’s promotion. Social media is a big part of that nowadays, and I’m still learning and developing myself with regard to Facebook and Twitter. I’m not the most outgoing person in the world, so putting myself out there and making a connection with people I don’t know is often difficult. In general, I would say one of the most difficult things is the endless sites which post authors’ work available for free, basically stealing the pennies out of their pockets. That’s both difficult to stop, and difficult to stomach.

 
What advice would you give an author, just starting out, who wants to write gay fiction?

One piece of advice I was given, which I’ve repeatedly taken, is read, read, and read some more. When you’re done reading, read again. I’ve learned so much by reading a wide variety of gay romance authors’ work and my writing has improved greatly by doing that.

 If a reader hasn't read any of your books yet, which one would you recommend?

I would suggest they read my brand new novel, Beyond The Scars, being my newest work. It’s contemporary which seems to be one of the most popular genres, it has angst, real life dramas, and a happy ending, so something for everyone. And my writing has developed and improved over the year I’ve been published, so I would also say it’s my best work to date, but that’s just me.

What is it that you believe draws a large amount of female readers to MM novels?

I’ve always found it difficult to identify with the female characters in “bodice-ripper” romances. I like to explore the discovery of a male character realising he likes other men, and the more equal relationship between two men than what you would have in a MF romance. Not only that, but I’ve always thought two men together is incredibly hot, and from what I’ve heard from other women, they feel the same way.

Where would you like to see your career in 10 years from now?

I would love to be able to write full time and earn enough to make a living. If I could get my wish, in 10 years’ time I’d be spending my mornings writing, and my afternoons reading, editing, promoting and so on. And I’d have enough to pay the bills each month without having to worry.

What is something that you would like your readers to know about you?

I have a tattoo on my back with the words Carpe Diem in it. I try to live by the motto “seize the day” and cram as much into life as I can. We’re only here once, and the time we have may be cut short unexpectedly. You never know what’s around the corner, so live it while you can, as well as you can.

What do your readers mean to you and how interactive are you with them?

Without my readers, I’d still be writing little fics to entertain myself, so I’m very grateful to each and every one of them. I love my old Fanfic readers, who encouraged me to take the next step, and I love everyone who’s bought one of my books, or joined in one of my promo events, or taken the time to talk with me on Facebook or Twitter. Every comment encourages me to keep writing and putting out more stories for them to (hopefully) enjoy.

What was the last book you read and your thoughts on it?

I read Layla Dorine’s debut novel with Wayward Ink Publishing - Guitars and Cages. I love an angsty story, and damn, there is angst. Main character Asher is full of pain and self-loathing over things that happened in his past, and at times the reader despairs of him ever pulling himself out of the hole he’s digging deeper and deeper for himself. The story really moved me (to tears several times) and I found myself rooting for him and praying for him to move forward and find love and a happy ending. I won’t tell you whether he gets it or not - just read the book for yourself. It’s amazing.

If you could come back as any animal or mammal, what would it be and why?

When I was a kid I always wanted to be a horse, but I’m not so sure I’d enjoy literally getting a bit between my teeth and carrying somebody about! I’d quite like to come back as a dog. My own dog (a Doberman named Trojan), lives the life of Riley, only having to think about sleeping, eating, going for long walks, and barking at the Postman!

Do you have a philosophy by which you live?

I mentioned this before and it’s Carpe Diem. Live each day like it’s your last, because you never know when it will be your last.

What is your favourite curse word?

Haha, I say “fuck” a lot, but I’m sure most people do. If I’m really really angry, I say the “C” word, otherwise used for women’s bits, which I can’t bring myself to write because I find it very vulgur. I like it for the reason it makes me cringe and laugh at the same time, so whatever I was mad about seems less important.

Lastly, any hints on your next book that you might be working on??

I can tell you I have another release at the end of August, called Beautiful Thunder. It’s set in the early 1990s around the era of the second wave of glam rock. That was my era growing up and I spent many a night in a (UK) famous club called Rock City in the city of Nottingham. This club features in the story, which is about a young guy, Alex, trying to make it as a singer. He joins a local band and falls for the guitarist, but their budding relationship and the band’s future are fraught with problems.

What I’m working on right now is a novella set in the same time period as Beautiful Thunder. It’s unnamed as yet, but is about a guy named Martin who’s always hung out, gone out etc with his best friend, dating girls together and so on. But it never felt right to him. Then one night in a gloomy nightclub, he meets one androgynous person who he tries to convince himself is a girl, but inside knows it’s a boy, and he falls hook, line and sinker.

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This is so different to what I normally read, but I have to say this will be on my read again list.

You completely feel for Shiki, whose husbands have walked out on him with no warning.  He is so heartbroken and devastated you want to reach in and give him a hug.  Shiki feels total despair and such a total failure that he believes the only thing that will take away his pain is his death.

Knowing that their children are safe with his family, Shiki decides to go to the one place that he knows will end with his death….. but what he hadn’t bargained on was Ganz.  Ganz steps in to stop his being killed, and obviously Shiki is not very happy about this.

Although he is badly hurt, Shiki is slow at healing and it is at this point that Ganz makes a deal with him – to stay with Ganz for two months and allow his body and soul to heal, and if at the end of this time Shiki still wants to die, then Ganz will not stop him.  Shiki agrees to this, and his body begins to heal more rapidly, and once he had begun to heal he started taking in more of his surroundings, and Ganz began spending more time with him and the two of them became close friends.

However, he has avoided all contact with his family and his best friend from childhood Blake – but what he doesn’t know is that Ganz has been keeping his family and Blake informed of his progress.  Shiki is not happy to hear this, and even when Ganz hands his a phone and tells him to contact his family and Blake, he hides the phone away and doesn’t call.

When the time of their deal is over, Shiki decides that he doesn’t want to die, but asks Ganz if he can say longer, as he is not ready to yet face his family or more importantly Blake.  Ganz agrees straight away, but when questioned tells Shiki that he thought he was going to ask to die…..

Shiki finally plucks up the courage to ring the one person he has been avoiding at all costs – Blake, and then we are taken on the journey of Blake and Shiki being best friends, but then it changes to one of lovers…. and wow did we take a journey then, especially as it was not a meet and then jump straight into bed scenario.

I totally loved how the author wrote the change from best friends to that of lovers, how these two men complimented each other - where Shiki was rather impulsive Blake on the other hand came across as being more down to earth. To me it seemed like they were both afraid of acting of the new feelings that were inside them, mostly for fear of losing a precious friendship, but when they finally became lovers, they seemed to grow even closer than they were, but never taking the other for granted.   

This is book 1 of this series, and I for one cannot wait for book 2 to be released.  I was totally hooked from the start of this book, and could not put it down (well I had to as I had to run errands, but picked it up on my return!!).  This book was so full of emotion,  the author got this across in a way that it was as if you could feel it coming out of the book.

My swords swished through the air, making sharp sounds as they cut down thick branches. I glided in a tight circle, keeping the first attackers at a safe distance and slicing through them, one at a time. My muscles bulged and contracted, my grip changing as the blades danced around me, and I could feel the cold trickle of sweat down my arms, chest, and back. 

They quickly figured out that too many of them meant too wide of a circle and they could not approach without poking each other’s eyes out, so they switched to attacking two or three at a time. I smirked and continued moving at the same pace, attacking just when they were counting on a defensive move, trimming down their numbers. Swordplay wasn’t something anyone but the Japanese practiced much these days. Everyone focused on close combat and making do with whatever they found nearby. That was a great strategy for times when you were surprised and needed to be confident in your victory. I supposed one wolf mocking your rules qualified for that, unless said wolf was me. 

The last group approached, anger and murderous thoughts making their eyes burn. They had seen their pack-mates fall and I knew they wanted to tear me to pieces. They were going to do just that eventually, but I wasn’t planning on making it any easier for them. I wasn’t looking for an easy out. What I wanted was one last stand, one more chance to be the samurai I’d always seen myself as. Fight many, die with honor. Like my parents had done before me, I wanted to find my death on the battlefield. Sure, they hadn’t gone looking for their untimely demise, but then again, they’d been together until the moment they died. They’d only thought they’d have to face the world without the other and did the craziest things they could in that short amount of time. 

As the last one got wounded badly enough to cease the fight, I placed each blade on one side and sat on the ground, my legs crossed in front of me. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing, clearing my mind of the battle I had just survived and focusing on the next one. The second wave was getting closer, I felt it, and that some of them had already started shifting to their human forms, trying to find the best potential weapons, just like their tribe mates before them. 

Not all the wolves that had been in the first attack had died. Some were just wounded and I saw them crawling away, dragging their bodies over the unfriendly terrain and away from me. If they had any brains, they’d use whatever energy they had to shift. It would still hurt like a bitch, but the wounds would heal faster. They might even get their chance at revenge before the fight was over. 

Writing the Otaku Werewolf

Being an otaku is pretty much being the Japanese version of a geek or nerd. You know, video games, animations, comic books, everything tech. Plus amazing cosplay in some cases. Now, a lot of otakus are, 
just like the nerds, thought to be unattractive and uninteresting. Well, here comes my Shiki, who’s strong, sexy, and heavily into the Visual Kei look. Visual Kei, if you are not a Japanese music fan, usually 
entails a lot of makeup and a lot of crazy outfits. Just watch a few Gackt videos (that Japanese rock idol is the physical and sometimes behavioral inspiration for Shiki) and you’ll get what I mean. 

There were a few reasons why I wanted to make sure Shiki was into anime and video games and a voracious reader of manga. First off, I think all those are cool, I grew up with Japanese animations, so 
why not have character share my passion? It’s the best way to point the world in the right direction. 

Secondly, I loved to break him out of the usual otaku perception, and make him act and look so far from a true nerd, it would make everyone question their assumptions. Labels, of all kinds, are sometimes annoying and I love to mess them up. Thirdly, Visual Kei is way too awesome to be ignored and I think men that wear heels and make up and tight leather pants are freaking amazing!

I had to make sure Shiki went back to his passions throughout the book, hence his stroll through Akihabara, how he catches up with video games and anime when he gets back from Ganzorig’s territory, 
and how a cosplayer triggers memories of his former mates. It couldn’t be just me saying he loves that stuff, it had to be present throughout. Cause any real otaku would make damn sure they caught up with episodes they’d missed! Heck, I sometimes spend months waiting for a new chapter in a manga serial I am reading :D

I spent a lot of time thinking of how to treat the androgynity issue, but I decided not to go into very detailed descriptions of my characters. Yet, in how I made Shiki act, and speak, I wanted him to be as alpha as he could be, yet still wear makeup. If you’ve seen pictures of Gackt, you know he’s quite androgynous, but hearing him speak or seeing him train (he’s also a martial artist), there’s no doubt about how masculine he comes across. So I used that as inspiration, and hope that Shiki managed to reflect most of it. 

In the end, he’s just endearing as hell when he’s too busy playing video games or watching anime to take care of important tribe business. And I think at times we should all celebrate the slacker in ourselves!